I’m angry but it’s your fault
Posted July 28, 2007on:
In the face of an annoying situation it is easy to say he/she made me do it. One looks at the other person as the source of all your anger. Whether it is for a few minutes or a life time an individual can focus on another human and blame them for every ounce of rage that they hold. This perspective on anger is easy but highly destructive. This approach is void of personal responsibility and allows the angry party to focus their attention away from themselves. Destruction comes when the angry party begins to feel justified enough to deliver angry words or physical aggression to the other person.
Anger management is about personal responsibility. No matter what comes at us we are responsible for our reaction to that situation. In anger management class an individual learns how to deal with faulty perceptions and take responsibility for his/her own emotions and actions. Learning this skill will help to shift blame and increase personal responsibility. If you tend to shift blame and not taking responsibility as part of your pattern of anger you should seek help.
Anger management programs should include anger management, stress management, emotional intelligence and communication skills. To find a provider in your area visit www.anger-management-resources.org
Carlos Todd, LPC, NCC, CAMF
President of the American Association of Anger Management Providers
Carlos Todd is the owner of Todd’s Anger Management Solutions in Charlotte, NC