Archive for September 2008
Unhappy with job and angry
Posted on: September 30, 2008
Millions of people worldwide live with the daily frustration, agitation, fear, anger and discouragement of being stuck in a job or career position where they feel stifled, stagnated and suffocated. A career position that does not exhibit any signs of upward growth in the form of more challenging assignments, more responsibilities, a hefty salary or positive prospects of a promotion can make you feel desperate, agonized and helpless. The pain of this victim-hood and not knowing what to do next leads to anger and more anger. In order to amputate this spiral of going nowhere you must take drastic steps instantly before you have a nervous breakdown. If you feel that there is more to this but you are sure of how to go to the next level, discuss the issue with a trustworthy colleague or friend. Don’t indulge in negative self talk as it will make the situation worse. Deep down you know and feel that you can do better, be happier and also be more successful. In case of such a situation, before anger and frustration reign over your commonsense and power to think rationally, you must resign form your current job and move on.
You must tell yourself that tomorrow is going to be different and you too will have the chance to bask in the glory of success and gratitude. Make a conscious effort to reflect, do the right thing and sincerely trust your gut feelings. It doesn’t seem fruitful to stay back in the same company year after year if your feelings of anger and resesentment are going to persist and grow more intense. It’s pretty obvious that your old days are not working and now it’s not a matter of staying up late, getting in earlier or putting in more hours of hard work. If your job is not allowing you to flourish and blossom and you feel stuck in it, its time you make mature decision and move on. You can probably take a short holiday that will help you to heal and cure grief and trauma before you kick start your new job
Carlos Todd, LPC
Communication at work is generally of 4 types:
1. Passive communication
2. Aggressive communication
3.Passive aggressive communication
4. Assertive communication
Passive communication is a style whereby an employee operates from the backbench, tends to avoid conflicts and stays away from the risk of upsetting his/her colleagues. It results in lose-win situation and brings about feelings of victimization and loss of control. However an aggressive person uses his power, control and intimidation to get his needs met. He is disrespectful and hurtful towards others and emphasizes on a win-lose situation. However a passive aggressive person incorporates elements from both the previous mentioned styles. He tends to be more forgetful, procrastinates and intentional inefficiency. He cannot be direct in his communication with others and makes excuses for his inefficiency. Passive aggressive behavior is nothing else but simply indirect aggression. You can avoid this kind of behavior in your workplace by speaking up and speaking out. If you let the passive aggressive person know that you will not be manipulated this time, then you can stop him from scheming.
Always be calm with a passive aggressive person and refute him with power phrases like ‘that sounded sarcastic .did you mean that?’ passive aggressive individuals are back stabbers in the literal sense. They can make difficult for you while pretending that nothing is going wrong. Always have witnesses in case of discussions with a passive aggressive person. He is likely to deny an incident when someone other than you can stand for its occurrence. Also keep all the work with the passive aggressive person in writing. This will safeguard your interests and deter him from proving you incompetent. You may not be able to change such a person but can protect yourself by using strategies and reducing your dependence on this individual.
Carlos Todd, LPC
Do you need to know if you have an ANGER PROBLEM. Click on this link for for a free anger management assessment.
Carlos Todd, LPC
Coming soon Conflict Coaching & Consulting, PLLC will be introducing a series of anger and conflict management online courses in emotional competence, managing stress, communication skills, resiliency, negotiation and conflict styles. These courses will serve the needs of those who want to learn more about anger and conflict management. Our company will also introduce a series of CD’s, DVDs and other products on conflict management.
Carlos Todd, LPC
What could you do with eight hours? We recommend you use it to take our fast-track anger management class. Sessions held in our Charlotte, North Carolina office. Please call 704.804.0841 for details.
Click Here for class schedule in Charlotte, North Carolina
To request a seat in our class Click Here
Each participant will recieve a computer based anger management assessment, a certificate of completion and our new workbook–Anger & Conflict 101: 6 Simple Tools to Master Anger. Conflict Coaching & Consulting, PLLC staff presents interactive Sunday class in our state of the art offices. This class usually has up to eight participants including our off-site clients. Participants include business owners, husbands, wives, executives, students, nurses and many other individuals from all walks of life.
ANGER ON MY MIND 
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